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"If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week."
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Fun fact : A queen bee uses her stinger only to sting another queen bee. - from

An Irish couple [ Irish Jokes ]
An Irish couple, whose married bliss was not without a few "squalls" received a humble lecture from their priest regarding their disgraceful quarrels. "Why, that dog and cat you have ...

What does a man and a floor have in common? [ Men ]
Q: What does a man and a floor have in common? A: You lay them right the first time you can walk all over them forever!! ...

After Man, God Said... [ Miscellaneous ]
What did God say after he created man?"I can do better than this" and he made woman.But the disruptions created in Adam's internals when God removed his rib were so great that it ...

Stupid Insults 28/31 [ Miscellaneous ]
Spent a decade on the leading edge of drug experimentation. Still boots to DOS. Still sending messages with his secret decoder ring. Still traumatized from the forest fire in "Bambi". ...

3 Vampires in Bar [ Bar Jokes ]
Three vampires walk into a bar and sit down. The first vampire says,"I'd like a pint of blood." The second vampire says,"I'd like a pint of blood, too." Then the third ...

Few Men In Heaven [ Miscellaneous ]
Why do so few men end up in heaven?They never stop to ask for directions. ...

Last 10 Things Any Woman Would Ever Say [ Miscellaneous ]
10. Could our relationship be more physical?? I'm tired of being just friends.9. Go ahead and leave the seat up. It's easier for me to douche that way.8. I think hairy butts are really ...

Dead dog [ Miscellaneous ]
A farmer named Muldoon lived alone in the countryside with a pet dog which he loved and doted on. After many long years of companionship, the dog finally died so Muldoon went to the parish ...

Coincidences of Bill Gates [ Miscellaneous ]
The real name of "the" Bill Gates is William Henry Gates III.Nowadays he is known as Bill Gates (III), where "III" means the order of third (3rd.)By converting the letters of his ...

The resume bloopers [ Job/Office Jokes ]
These are taken from real resumes and cover letters and were printed in Fortune Magazine:1. I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience.2. I have lurnt Word Perfect 6.0 computor and ...

Four boastful men [ Miscellaneous ]
Four men are golfing one day. The first man steps up to tee and states boastfully "My son is so rich that he bought his lover a house".The second man steps up to tee and says, "Well, ...

Great A Hot & Juicy Story [ Sex ]
Great A Hot & Juicy Story Well, I was loafin' around the salad bar at the burger stand one chili day on Coney Island, when I Frito-Lay'd my eyes on the sweetest little tomato ...

Meet the Genie [ Miscellaneous ]
A couple was golfing one day on a very, very exclusive golf course, lined with million dollar houses. On the third tee the husband said, "Honey be very careful when you drive the ball-don't ...

Drunk and Arthritis [ Miscellaneous ]
A drunk that smelled like a brewery got on a bus one day. He sat down next to a priest. The drunk's shirt was stained, his face was full of bright red lipstick and he had a half-empty bottle of ...

Retire Aged Personell Early [ At Work ]
Retire Aged Personell EarlyTO ALL MCCCD EMPLOYEESFROM GOVERNING BOREDDATE 22 APR 19861. As a result of the HAYZE mismanagement study, we mustdrastically cut most salaries and reduce ...