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What did the egg say to the boiling water? [ Miscellaneous ]
What did the egg say to the boiling water?"I just got laid and now you want me to get hard?!"Sent by Sarah ...

An artist asked the gallery owner... [ Miscellaneous ]
An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time. "I have good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good news is that a ...

Cheap widow [ Miscellaneous ]
A woman goes into the local newspaper office to see that the obituaryfor her recently deceased husband is published. After the editorinforms her that the fee for the obituary is 50 cents a word, ...

A man moves into a nudist colony... [ Miscellaneous ]
A man moves into a nudist colony. He receives a letterfrom his mother asking him to send her a current photoof himself in his new location. Too embarrassed to lether know that he lives in a nudist ...

What's the difference between a policeman's knightstick and... [ Miscellaneous ]
Q: What's the difference between a policeman's knightstickand a magician's wand?A: A Magician's wand is for cunning stunts. ...

How do you tell two KKK members apart? [ Miscellaneous ]
How do you tell two KKK members apart?Ask their wife. After all, she's their mother.... ...

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? [ Miscellaneous ]
Q: What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?A: A quarter-pounder with cheese. ...

What would Princess Diana be doing right... [ Miscellaneous ]
Q: What would Princess Diana be doing right now if she were alive today?A: Scratching on the lid of her casket. ...

What has four legs, is big, green, fuzzy... [ Miscellaneous ]
What has four legs, is big, green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree would kill you?A pool table. ...

A woman goes into a bar and orders a beer... [ Miscellaneous ]
A woman goes into a bar and orders a beer. She grabs the beer and tips it down the back of her skirt. The barman looks amazed as she orders another and again tips it down her skirt.Finally, the ...

What is the rallying cry of the International Dyslexic Pride movement? [ Miscellaneous ]
What is the rallying cry of the International Dyslexic Pride movement? Dyslexics Untie! ...

Why are there so many Jones's in the phone book? [ Miscellaneous ]
Why are there so many Jones's in the phone book? Because they all have phones. ...

A pedophile dies in a car crash and goes to heaven... [ Miscellaneous ]
A pedophile dies in a car crash and goes to heaven. He's stopped atthe pearly gates by St. Peter, who is really miffed:"You swine. How can you have the audacity to try and enter heaven ...

There were these three morticians talking about... [ Miscellaneous ]
There were these three morticians talking about their greatest feats. The first one says, "I had this soldier who stepped on a land mine. Took me three days to get him ready for an open casket ...

Have you ever wondered why you wonder why? [ Miscellaneous ]
Have you ever wondered why you wonder why?I used to wonder why, but now I don't wonder why I wonder why.I wonder why I don't wonder why anymore? ...